So first things first… how the heck do you EVEN FIND MOMS GROUPS? Do you go on craigs list and put out an add…
nice married lady, looking for a good time with newborn-Breast feeds-baby carries-church going- yoga lover-LIKES PINA COLADAS but only if they are organic & sugar free…
My mom told me to call all the local churches and ask about mommy and me groups. My friend told me to go on facebook and search mommy and me groups in my area in LA. I know what your thinking don’t I have friends that have babies, well yes but I ALSO LIVE IN LA which means we have the 405 traffic and driving even to another part of the city with a newborn screaming in her car seat is not just an adventure its well … a full day for us. It could be scheduled at the perfect time right after nursing and diaper change between 11-2 and I would totally drive to visit my girl friends and their babies and have play dates and grab coffees and go for walks. Thats in perfect mom world however, in my world I just can’t imagine it going like that, I know my flaws. So I have decided I will date different moms groups.
Just like dating first you must find a way to meet said moms groups without being creepy, desperate or needy. You have to somehow invite your self out with said groups or have a member of said group invite you in. And just like dating you must present yourself in all your glory and charm to members of said moms groups so they want you to keep coming back and they invite you to other activities. This moms group dating seems already like it will be exhausting, just like dating. Plus just like a teenager dating I have no idea what to expect when I go out with these moms groups. I am already psyching myself out and I haven’t even put myself out there yet! YIKES! In a normal situation I would just show up somewhere strike up a convo with someone I had something in common with and become their mommy BFF overnight, but it feels like it will be different with a whole moms group. Are you all perfect pinterest moms? Do you go do crafts? Do you meet and talk about having a baby? Do you show up and have to do an intro every week and share time? Or because its LA is it going to be hard to even get into these groups did I need to sign up months ago?
Once you join a moms group are you in the group for life and you cant join another moms group, like a mom gang.
And what if you find a group but you don’t like them and just like dating one side breaks up or what if the ring leader doesn’t like you but you love the group? Seriously though I have NO IDEA what to expect or how to find a moms group or what you even do in a moms group. I googled moms group LA for a start… Theres a lot that pops up. The best mom and me classes, moms clubs, moms meet ups, baby boot camp, a bar called moms. I however have not really found a lot of ways to get into moms groups or mommy and me groups or to find out who attends these groups.
And trust me I have read all the advice on how to pick a moms group and where to go and why. Do you want to find friends, YES. Do you want to parenting advice or to talk out parenting issues in a non-judgemental setting, YES. Do you want support on issues like breast feeding, cluster feeding, other mom issues, YES. Do you want a safe and supportive space with no cattiness YES does this place exist? Just like dating you will have to decide what is most important and what your goals are in this experience. Just like in dating you will have to take an oath to not kiss and tell, not literally, but just like in dating you can’t share moms group secrets. Moms share personal info in the meetings and have to trust everyone in the group not to blab away their stories, even when you think its super weird or you’ve never heard of it. Parenting is the most individual experience in the world, and its a right as a parent to parent how you see fit and not to have others judge you or comment on it, plus its hard enough being a mom without other moms making you feel bad.
So just like dating I am going to put my ego aside, get out there, and make the first move if I must, and in a non-mom-blaby way I will document my mom dating adventures. PS if you have any suggestions for moms groups in LA please leave them below for me to check out! 🙂